Disney Princesses vs. Open-Eyed Sneezes

Posted by doularama | Filed under Parenting

One day my daughter told me that she is the only girl in her class who doesn’t have a princess backpack.  She wasn’t complaining, however.  She was merely making an observation.  It was no surprise to me and I was surely thrilled.  Why should her bookbag look like everyone else’s?  She had never even seen half of these characters until she started school.

At a flea market one day, my husband found a tasteful, handmade Snow White dress and bought it.  It would be years before anyone would be able to wear it, but it was purchased and put away much like many of our other frugal buys, including my daughter’s junior-sized, plain blue, Lands’ End, non-princess back pack.  Although the dress was probably made for a six-year-old, last year, at the age of four, it fit my daughter for Halloween.  My little girl didn’t know who Snow White was, much less any of the other newly-appropriated Disney princesses, so some time before she was to don her disguise, we showed her the movie.  No need for any other princess purchases, but that of the black wig.

Now, a year later, my daughter rubs elbows daily with children who are all too familiar with the trendy toys and looks.  She likely follows converstions pretty well without really knowing what they’re about.  She’ll describe one friend as “the girl with the Hannah Montana coat” and I’ll be able to pick her out, but neither of us knows anything about Miss Montana other than what she looks like.  How could we not know that? 

My daughter is different with a purpose.  I always strived to be different as a child.  I don’t know when it started.  Perhaps I just noticed that we’re all different anyway, so why not try to stand out?  It was a bumpy ride at times, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. 

In my twenties, I started wearing mascara and I refused to open my mouth while applying it just because everyone else does it that way.  It doesn’t really help.  It’s just some kind of instinct and I declined to partake.  I also heard, around this time, that it is impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.  Well, not only did I feel I had to prove my superiority to the authorities of facial impulses, it also happened to be a practical matter one day as I was in the middle of closed-mouthedly applying my mascara.  There I was having to sneeze and it was going to leave my makeup a blotchy mess, so I just didn’t close my eyes.  It did take some effort, but it was not impossible.

Now, I really don’t mind if my children spend their lives clenching their eyes with every sneeze.  They may even buy something just because someone else has it one day (but not with my money).  What I do want is for them to end up being independent thinkers with some self-confidence.  That would be different.

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Read more | Comments (0) | November 20th, 2009